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Getting older, going through life’s motions and dating a certain amount of people would usually make us think that we’ve learned how to choose better people to be with because we tend to believe that we’ve learned from our past mistakes. For us, this is called romantic evolution, which involves choosing a partner who’s significantly better than the last when it comes to dating.
However, a new research shows that to some degree, we actually don’t learn all that much and we’re most likely dating the same type of person over and over again. Here’s how.
Romantic Types and Science
The study, which was made by psychologists hailing from the University of Toronto, made use of a nine-year study in Germany that analyzed the personality traits of individuals, their ex and their current partners. Per the report, this includes openness, neuroticism, agreeableness, extraversion and conscientiousness.
“Our findings show that there is consistency in the personalities of people’s romantic partners, suggesting that people were dating a person similar to their ex-partner. I’d say whether [people] think they have a type or not, they do tend to end up dating with a similar type of person,” Yoobin Park, who worked on the research, said.
Furthermore, Park also added that relationships tend to end due to reasons that are oftentimes not joyful, it won’t be surprising if you’ll find the same frustrations in the next person that you date because oftentimes they are of the same type, be it habits, attitudes and such.
“Perhaps people encounter the same type of conflicts and experience some kind of hopelessness with this new partner who resembles the ex,” Park said.
Nevertheless, there are still positives to this.
“One implication of the partner personality consistency we identified for future relationship maintenance is that people might fare better with the new partner, to the extent that they can transfer the skills they learned from their past relationship to the new one,” Park explained.
Ultimately, Park believes that dating the same type of person multiple times can lead to positive personal change and growth if we want it to.